MIT is still nerdy.

Friday, September 24, 2010 at 7:59 PM
Dear god I just realized I'm playing some sort of chinese version of Magic or Yu-Gi-Oh.

The Butterfly Effect

at 12:37 PM
So my days have been relatively busy this week. I've at least had events to go to, homework to write, a presentation to prepare, workouts to do. This weekend I'm going to eat hot pot with some of my chinese lab members, and then the bar. I'm trying to show them the American bar culture. I'm also going to a motorcycle store again (a different one), and sailing. It seems that I'm able to keep my Fridays and Saturdays pretty busy, after which I will need some to buckle down some on Sunday to do some work. My work is piling up, and I'm starting to feel like I can't maintain these 10-6 work days only during the week.

It's pretty undeniable now that life here is getting better for me. I'm starting to feel like I have a network that is building up. Funny how things have changed from a year ago. At this point last year, I felt like I didn't know anyone. I had one iffy person to call if I wanted to go do something on a Saturday night.

I guess the difference in this year didn't come from any drastic change in strategy or circumstances. I mean, I've changed since last year, and my situation in returning to school has changed too, but I don't feel like those have been major factors. If I think about what is really different this year, I can point to just a few things. I had a lot of friends that I could call when I *just* got here, so I didn't feel lonely all the time. I'd have to say this was probably the biggest change. Even so, having a lot of friends elsewhere only gave me a temporary boost. I'd say a total of maybe 2-3 people made this year different. I met this guy Kris, randomly at a bank back in my hometown, who I found out was moving to Boston the same time I was. We ended up hanging out here in Boston, and it's been good. The second guy I met was a new student in my lab, from China. I didn't expect him to amount to much of a friend, because he was chinese, and I mostly didn't think we'd be able to relate as well.

So it seems that all these little things that happen by chance have turned into good things for me. I've always known that in life, you can't create opportunities, but you can be ready to take advantage of them when they appear. I guess I just for what it would be like to take advantage of an opportunity. One of my best friends from college, I remember, I used to think was really nerdy. Actually, I was kinda annoyed at him. But we ended up rooming together and had a great year together.

That's not to say little things *always* and *only* little things cause big changes. I'm at MIT because of many small factors, but also because I studied a lot for my GRE's, and I worked hard during the application process.

Loneliness in a New Place

at 12:33 PM
I wrote this earlier this week. Things are somewhat better, but I still feel lonely on occasion.

Previously written:

I guess I should write about this, while it's still fresh on my mind. Moving to Boston feels really lonely. I didn't realize how strong I felt it last time, but I recognize it this time. It makes sense if you think about it; all my friends, my local hangouts, favorite things to do, all of those things are gone. While I might have everything I need in my new home, Boston, they aren't as familiar. I have to worry about my necessities being available and reliable. For example, I don't have a go-to spot to grab a quick bite to eat yet, near my apartment. There're lots of great restaurants (cheap pho!), but I just haven't settled on anything yet. Stuff like this is unsettling. I know I'm not alone either, because I have friends who have moved to new places recently who are feeling the same things I am.

At the end of today, like most days, I lingered in the office. I didn't want to go home, because there wasn't much to do there. I don't have anyone to hang out with around my apartment yet. As a result, I feel like the only thing I can do when I go home is cook, eat, and play starcraft 2. Hardly something to look forward to. This was the same problem that I ran into last year.

The solution? Given that I don't really need to do work once I come home, maybe I'll look into attending those free concerts around town. Or see if there are other activities to do. Or maybe see if my lab mates are up for something. I think some of them don't do much at night either. That, or get my motorcycle ASAP. I'm sure I'll have plenty to do once I get on wheels :)

-Howitzer

Brave New World

Monday, September 20, 2010 at 12:34 PM
So, I'm back at MIT now. It's been almost 2 months, since I've posted here, and I guess a lot has happened. I spent pretty much all of August wasting my life away, feeling like I was in limbo. Truthfully, I can't remember much of what I did during that month. I can remember a few important events that happened, but the rest is a great big blankness in my mind. It wasn't until around mid-August that I found out I was allowed to return to school. After that, it was a wedding, and then a short trip to Boston to find housing for the upcoming school year. I'm not sure, but I think I visited Grand Rapids twice too.

The return has been alright so far. Things are going as smoothly as they could possibly be. I live near the Boston University campus, directly across the street from a supermarket, with an asian grocery store 1 block down the street. The subway stop is at the corner of my block, as are bus stops. I'm surrounded by plentiful ethnic restaurants, enough so that I could feasibly have something different every day of the week, if I had that much money to spend. About the only things I could complain about are the smallness of my apartment, and its distance to MIT. It takes about 40 mins to commute there. I usually set my longest tolerable commute to about 25 mins, but in this case, I'm free to read or talk on the train so the commute doesn't seem nearly so bad. Plus, if I choose, I can walk across the Harvard bridge on the way to school. This alone makes the commute seem awesome. On a bright and sunny day, I can look to my right down the expansive Charles River, and see the gleaming towers of the Boston skyline on one side, and the somewhat less glitzy buildings of MIT on the other side. It's quite nice.

My thoughts on the return. I had some apprehensions about returning. I wasn't sure how the lab would respond to my hasty departure last year. There were uncertainties about the social and leisure life I'd be able to have here, as well as the academic work load. So far, everything seems to be a lot easier than they were last year. I'm actually able to keep a somewhat regular 8-10 hour schedule during the week, and then not work during the weekend. However, I'm sure I will see more work coming my way as we get deeper into the semester.

When I first came to MIT, someone once told me that New Englanders were a reserved, and withdrawn bunch of people. That makes it hard for new people to feel at home here. She said that it only took that 1 special friend here to turn things around. I would agree with that statement. Last year, I never made any "special" friends. I met a bunch of people, but never really felt comfortable with any of them. I'm working really hard on finding people I enjoy being with this time.

I haven't posted in so long that when I finally get around to it, I feel as if I've forgotten a lot of the thoughts and emotions I went through. It's a pity that now when I've gone back to record them, I feel as if I'm grasping at the feeble wisps of my once vivid reflections. I guess this is a good reminder to me to keep writing.

Back to Boston

at 7:59 AM
Back at MIT for two weeks.

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